>one, some or none

>
Carrie:

“You want a Skittle?”

Me:

“A ‘Skittle‘?”

“Uh, yeah…a Skittle…”

“But Skittles aren’t one Skittle. They’re Skittles, not ‘Skittle’. They weren’t meant to be alone like that…”

“Uh, yeah they can…you can have one Skittle…”

“No, no you can’t. You can either have some, or you can have none. You can’t just have one…it’s like Reese’s Pieces.”

“Reese’s Pie-“

“You know, you can’t just have one piece. You have to have Reese’s Pieces.”

“You can have just one. You can say, ‘Can I have a Reese’s Pieces?'”

“Now you’re obscenely gramatically incorrect.”

“Say what you like. My opinion remains.”

I decided to call for reinforcements.

“David…what dou you call one Reese’s Pieces?”

“Just one? As in, “a Piece”? That’s just wierd…”

“Yeah, I know. So what do you call it?”

“You don’t call it anything, you can’t have just one Reese’s Piece…”

“That was my argument as well…”

“She doesn’t know this? You didn’t tell her?”

“She is a stubborn one…I did warn her however…”

“Does she realize the risk – wait, we shouldn’t even be discussing this…”

“I know…terrible things are afoot. If we don’t stop now, we could possibly create a paradox that could create a fissure in the space-time continuum thereby negating all human existence!!!”

“Oh, my God! What are we doing??”

Carrie, o’ harbinger of death, chimes in, smiling,

“What about M&M’s?”

…and retracts her Skittle(s) offer.

voulez-voulez-vous you can’t eat just one.

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